Monday, March 30, 2009

for me...

a rambling session. After the last few days, I think I deserve it.

After a forced-relaxation vacation for a week, I was thrown back into the storm, literally a blizzard. A blizzard full of snow, work, moving, my life-routine itself. Most of the time I thrive and relish in the fast-paced ride my daily routine calls for...but for some reason I feel completely overwhelmed. All of the pieces that make up my heart, my life, seem to be all coming to a head at the true life goal: the human connection. Over the last few weeks, the definition of the human connection has been filling my thoughts, making me wonder what it means...for me and for the people in my life. I feel myself fighting for connections in any way possible in order to find a better understanding as to what it is that makes me fulfilled, happy and content. I guess I am self-conscious because of my mistrust in my own wants and needs, and feel like I will not be given what I deserve until I know what it is will absolutely fill my heart. This is in no way helping my current seek for contentment.

This past week was full of transition and mental and emotional brain power. Thoughts of moving, Dad, friends, family, and overall-my life, are draining my usually-full, energy tank. However, I know that these times are a gift of personal growth and I will look back and see clearly the lessons learned.

Jess- thank you for being an absolute listening ear and heart.
Adam- thank you for your emotional and physical help with moving:).
Mom- thank you for continually reminding me you are always here for me.
Dad- thank you for the dime and the tax gift.
Staci- thank you for your time sharing your joyful heart with me.
Maddy- thank you for your acceptance, conversation and the sharing of laughs.

2 comments:

Madster said...

I love ya jilly bean :)

Jess said...

You are a remarkable woman. I'm pretty sure it was you who did all the listening :)